I cry happy tears

I think I cried for the first time today while watching my positively-parented kids interact with each other. And those were happy tears, believe me.

My 5 y/o daughter is sick today and is having a mild fever. She is in bed, and my 3 y/o son decides she is cold and starts looking for a blanket. Once she is safely tucked in, he decides to keep her even warmer by hugging her feet and promising that she wouldn’t get cold now that he is here to take care of her. At which point I feel I could actually cry. But then my daughter takes his hand and kisses it, just like that, without saying a word. I guess it was her way of thanking him.
And…tears alert, yep, I cried. I just couldn’t believe what I was witnessing.

Moral of the story: Never believe people who say we, positive parents, are raising spoiled selfish brats who will have no respect for anyone, will be unable to love anyone but themselves, and will probably end up in jail. If anything, we are raising the generation that will change the world for the better, and will bring more kindness and peace to those around them. Because this world could use a bit more love, don’t you think?

Advertisements

No more crying over spilled milk

20140826-210629.jpg

You have no idea how this brought back so many memories. Not very pleasant memories, too.

Here is the thing. My mom had short temper. She always lost it when I dropped or broke things by total accident. I was terrified of what would happen once something goes wrong and I am somehow involved. And this milk example? True story in my case, except with sour cream. I still remember it like it happened yesterday. I got a glass jar with sour cream out of the fridge, put it on the counter, and it fell. There was shattered glass and dairy all over the floor, and all I could think about was, “Oh my gosh, she’ll kill me now”. Not thinking of being careful trying not to get hurt on the glass, but actually terrified of my mom’s reaction. And of course she got furious and I was punished.
There were many other similar cases that I still remember quite clearly to this day, and they always involved me being scared, and I mean really scared, and then punished. I wish I’d remembered those accidents differently, or maybe hadn’t even remembered them at all.

Continue reading

No more spanking memes, please

20140814-195253.jpg

Didn’t plan to revise any pro-spanking memes today, but was sent this new “gem” by a concerned peaceful parent, asking if anything could be done with it. I think that yes, something could and should be done with it. There are too many similar memes being shared with lots of laughter about “wonderful” childhood memories brought back in relation to these objects. Well, you know what? It is one thing to remember these often misused household items, and it is another thing to see them as something amusing and worth repeating with your own children in this day and age.

I know, I know, I said it a million times before, but I will say it again: TIMES CHANGED. Continue reading

Quote (Robin Williams)

20140812-205534.jpg

Robin Williams (1951-2014)

I loved him as a kid, I love his work as an adult, and I have just introduced my own kids to Ms. Doubtfire a couple of weeks ago after they fell in love with Genie in “Aladdin”.

I am very sad, but I hope he finally found peace that he was searching.

Non-threatening 1-2-3 count

20140808-211002.jpg

There is one thing I don’t like hearing parents do to their kids. I hated it when I was a kid myself, I hate it now when I see it happen in public. You must know the routine. Little Johnny is asked to wrap it up an leave the playground, but he wants to play more. After a few unsuccessful attempts to convince Johnny to pay attention, the whole “I am going to count to 3 now” starts with an obligatory volume adjustment by going louder as numbers climb up. My mom used to do that, and it was terrifying. Intimidation and humiliation (if you’re in public) at its best.

When I had kids of my own I knew I was going to parent peacefully, and threatening kids with 1-2-3 wasn’t going to cut it because, honestly, what was I supposed to do when the counting was done and nothing changed? Spank them? Nope. Yell at them? Unlikely. Time-out? I don’t do that either. So, really, this wasn’t going to work for me for too many reasons. Continue reading

One more revised meme

20140806-215351.jpg

Time for another revised meme. This time something that has been around for a while, and is normally shared by well-meaning parents who truly believe that in order to be a good parent you need to be mean to your kids, and have them acknowledge their hate for you at least once in their lifetime, according to this meme anyway. Otherwise you failed them.

I have a problem with this approach to parenting. In fact, I have a HUGE problem with it. Times changed and we have lots of scientific proof stating that being a negative parent does more harm to children than good. Yes, our parents probably believed the things we now know are not necessarily true, but it doesn’t mean we have to keep believing them.

Continue reading