Is ‘shy’ just a label?


This is something that has been on my mind lately. ‘Shy’ kids and how the world sees them, or treats them. Is there even such a thing as a truly ‘shy’ person, or is it more about being an introvert and needing some extra time to get to know new places and people? If only we are given that extra time as adults, and especially as kids… Imagine how much easier life could become for some of us.

Here is an interesting article I found on the subject. For full text go here:

“Have you ever been in a public situation and one of your children will not talk or answer questions? Maybe you followed up their actions with “Oh, he is just shy”. Sound familiar?
All children are different. They have different personalities and temperaments. As parents, we tend to worry and even be embarrassed by our less outgoing, more reserved children. There are things we can do as parents to teach our children so they feel more comfortable around new people and in social situations.

First… The DON’TS

Pressure will most likely turn into a power struggle where your child will act exactly how you don’t want them to act, just to prove that they are in control.

It can be embarrassing to have our 3 year old hiding between our legs, refusing to talk to our friends, neighbors, and co-workers. We might think it makes us look like bad parents, like we don’t have control of our children, and that they don’t respect us and won’t obey. If others judge, it is their problem. We know our children best. We need to do what is best for them. Don’t let what others think affect our actions.

Now… The DO’S

Explain to your child what will take place in the upcoming situation. Explain that there will be new people who want to say hello, shake their hands, and ask them their names. Give them a good idea of what might happen so they are not caught off guard.

Don’t shelter your children. Expose them to lots of different situations with different people. Give them opportunities to be social, but don’t force them to perform in the situations. Give them lots of new experiences and opportunities. ”

Now go and read the whole thing, you won’t regret it.

Photo: Runar Pedersen Holkestad (Flickr)


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