I was reading to my 4 y/o daughter today and we found a new word for her: ‘password’. While trying to explain what it meant and how it worked, I suggested we should come up with a password for the two of us. As I was just starting to sift through some random simple words in my head, she told me she’d already picked the word for us, to my surprise. It was real quick. And the word she picked shocked me, but in a good way. It also made me feel very proud of her, of me, of all of us who are trying to break the cycle of our own ‘negative parenting’ upbringing despite the criticism from the general parenting public. It made me believe, yet again, that we are not just wasting our time, we are changing the future through our children.
And the random word my 4 year-old positively parented kid picked was…LOVE.
I think one of the hard things about being a peaceful and positive parent is dealing with all the unwanted ‘negative parenting’ advice and suggestions you get from others. And you always seem to have these “well-wishers” when you are especially vulnerable, tired, stressed, maybe doubting if your peaceful parenting style is even working. You have to be strong and believe in yourself. Believe in yourself and your children. Love, respect, patience, and trust will lead to much better long-term results than any instant, short-term ‘negative parenting’ method like spanking, punishment, or screaming ever would.
And I am saying it because sometimes I start doubting myself, but then my kids do or say something amazing, proving that it is working, after all. And then I mentally pat myself on the shoulder and just smile when I meet yet another “well-wisher”. I just smile. 🙂
This is something that has been on my mind lately. ‘Shy’ kids and how the world sees them, or treats them. Is there even such a thing as a truly ‘shy’ person, or is it more about being an introvert and needing some extra time to get to know new places and people? If only we are given that extra time as adults, and especially as kids… Imagine how much easier life could become for some of us.
Here is an interesting article I found on the subject. For full text go here:
“Have you ever been in a public situation and one of your children will not talk or answer questions? Maybe you followed up their actions with “Oh, he is just shy”. Sound familiar?
All children are different. They have different personalities and temperaments. As parents, we tend to worry and even be embarrassed by our less outgoing, more reserved children. There are things we can do as parents to teach our children so they feel more comfortable around new people and in social situations.